A parent's guide The Five Virtues at home.

The North Side Karate Student Handbook puts it plainly: “The five virtues are not rules for the dojo. They are guidelines for how we live our lives day to day.”

Class is where your child learns them. Home is where they stick. Below is each virtue the way NSK defines it, what it looks like on the mat, and a few small ways to back it up at home. None of it takes extra time. It mostly takes using the same words the instructors use.

Discipline

1. Discipline

   Doing what is right even if it's not what you want to do nor what comes easily.

On the mat, discipline is eyes on the instructor, feet on the line and one command at a time. At home:

• One instruction at a time. Give one, wait for it to get done, then give the next. That is how class runs, and kids who train are used to it.
• Give them one job that is theirs. A good one to start with: the gi folded and the belt in the bag the night before class.
• Name it when you see it. “You did your homework before the TV, even though you didn't want to. That's discipline.” Using the NSK definition tells them it counts outside the dojo too.

Respect

1. Respect

   The courteous treatment of those who have authority over you including your parents, teachers, and elders.

Every NSK class opens and closes with a bow, and an instructor is never called by first name. Notice who is in that definition, though: parents, teachers and elders. The dojo is just where they practice it. At home:

• Point out the list. Grandparents, teachers, coaches and you are all on it. Kids often think respect is a karate thing until somebody tells them it isn't.
• Ask for the dojo answer. When you call their name, look for the same eye contact and clear reply they give an instructor.
• Model it. How you talk about their teachers and instructors in front of them teaches more than anything you tell them.

Attitude

1. Attitude

   The right attitude means being positive and enthusiastic even in negative circumstances.

The important part is the end of that sentence. Anyone can be positive on a good day. At home:

• Ask instead of lecture. After a bad grade, a lost game or a form they can't get yet, try “What's the right attitude here?” They usually know the answer.
• Praise the effort, not just the result. “You kept going when it got hard” is the habit you want them to keep.
• Keep practice short and regular. A few minutes of their forms in the living room beats one long session before a rank test.

“Practice makes permanent, only improvement leads to perfection.”Grand Master D.E. Chambers

Self-Assurance

1. Self-Assurance

   A strong belief in oneself, that you can do anything; confidence.

Every new belt at NSK is proof your child can do something hard. The trick is helping them carry that proof into the rest of their week. At home:

• Let them teach you. Ask them to show you a stance or a block. Explaining something they know builds confidence fast.
• Connect the belt to the next hard thing. “You earned that belt. You can handle this spelling test.”
• Let them speak for themselves. Ordering their own food or greeting an adult by name is small, and it adds up.

And most of all, Honesty

1. and most of allHonesty

   Telling the truth and also making sure that those around you are honest as well.

NSK puts honesty last on the list and first in importance. The second half of the definition is the part kids miss: it is not only about their own truth, it is about standing up when the people around them aren't being honest. At home:

• Make the truth the easy choice. When they own up to something, keep your reaction calmer than it would have been if you found out another way.
• Talk about the second half. Ask what they would do if a friend lied to a teacher. There is no wrong time to have that conversation.
• Keep your own word. If you said you would come watch the rank test, be there.

One question at dinner

If you only take one thing from this, make it this question: “Which virtue did you use today?” Ask it at dinner or in the car. Some days the answer is big, most days it is small, and either way your child is thinking in the same words they hear on the mat.

NSK families tell us the change shows up outside the dojo. In their own Google reviews:

“It has helped him become more disciplined which has translated to better behavior at school.”Jennifer C., NSK parent

“They have taught him to be focused and disciplined when attending regular school.”Sharon, NSK grandparent

If your child doesn't train with us yet and you'd like to see the Five Virtues taught in person, come try a class. Kids, teens and adults all start at white belt. Read more about kids karate, after-school karate or the NSK story.